The problem is that maybe this car is a little too hot! For one thing, it makes my car look like shit. It's totally unfair that he should have a better car than mine. It also makes Phil a little too proud. And you know how those home wrecking bitches will try to get with him just because they like his car. It's not that I don't trust Phil. I just don't trust them bitches!
So last Tuesday I asked Phil if I could drive his Caliber to work. I could tell he didn't want me to, but he let me do it anyway. I guess he didn't get the hint that he was never going to drive this car again unless I'm riding in the passenger seat. If he's going to be driving to job sites all day then he can do it in my ex-husband's old piece of shit Mercury Cougar. It's already beat up, and it gets better gas mileage!
Phil realized by Thursday that I've taken his car as my own. He's been pouting like a child all weekend. I tried to tell him that he should go buy himself another car if he hates the Cougar so much, but I know he can't afford another car payment. Not on top of the payments for this house he bought me, and I'm sure he's still making payments on that ring.
Yes, I could probably afford to buy a new car for myself, but I told Phil before we got married that what's mine is MINE! One of the things I learned from my first marriage is that divorces can happen to anyone. No matter what happens, I will always be in a position to take proper care of me and my kids. Having this trustworthy new vehicle is just one more way that I can prepare for the worst.
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28 comments:
Makes perfect sense to me. I can't imagine any rational person having an argument with that logic. If he gets whiny, ditch him - and keep the Caliber.
Wait, Mom? Is that you writing this blog???
The most important thing is to look out for #1 (you) and your kids (#s 2-4). If Phil keeps giving you attitude remind him how empty and hollow his life was before you met!
wow, what a DB. Maybe you should ask your husband for a new set of teeth while you're at it.
um... does it occur to you that your selfish attitude makes you a bitter and nasty person? What gives you the right to treat another human being that way? Are you being a bitch to your current husband in advance of him becoming your ex-husband when he finally gets tired of you taking out your first-marriage-resentment out on him? Lady, you need to do some real long selfless soul searching and ask your self what do you do for him that is worth putting up with your crazy head games. I feel sorry for him and for you. You are going to end up a lonely, bitter woman if you don't get over it and stop thinking you deserve ANYTHING YOUR selfish self didn't work hard for. This is so very very sad....
Anonymous is right...this is so very, very sad. For Phil, that is.
It's incredible that a man would be dumb enough to think that if he buys a new car, that he has the right to drive it.
He has a dirty job, and there's no need going and messing up the seats with all that grime. I know Jaquelyn will keep the vehicle in better shape in the long run, hence retaining the KBB value, and saving money in the future if they ever sell or trade it in.
You should be taking life advice from Jackie & how to retain marital bliss & car value, not criticizing her because she doesn't fit *your* ideals of hard work & valor.
Let me tell you..Phil doesn't need that car for me to get with him. I've been doing that since before! So keep on thinking it's the car..I drive a corvette that he has a spare key to!
I love fucking men like your husband who have been walked over and downtrodden for years. They have so much pent up frustration! Hope I can meet Phil soon. Judging from your picture and personality, I don't think his decision would be hard. Kisses.
You're treating your man like dirt out of your own fears and resentment. Your afraid that he will cheat on you because a bling car will draw the hounds and because you have previously been messed with.
Give him some credit, give him the car. Stop repressing him or you will end up being the driving force behind the events you fear will happen.
No way would I marry a woman like you. Unbelievable, buy your own damn car. Your husband should grow some balls and divorce your ass before you take anything else!
All I have to say is:
:-(
I'm curious: when you dress up in black patent leather, 6-inch stiletto heels, and sporting a cat-o'-nine tails, do you call yourself Mistress Delilah, or some such? Do you get much business?
Damn, I wonder why I can't find you on E-Harmony?
I hope Phil smartens up and leaves soon with the car. I feel sorry for your kids. They should have a mother that cherishes them instead of considering them a pain in the ass. Get some life insurance and die.
So, what's the MPG like on the Caliber?
I don't remember how I happened to come across this blog a week ago, but I'm glad I did...this is some of the funniest sh1t I've ever read
I can't decide which is funnier, the comments or your blog. Keep up the laughs Jocelyn.
I uploaded your pic to AmIHotOrNot.com and you're hovering around a 2 out of 10....although don't feel bad, on AmIWhiteTrashOrNot.com you're a 10!
WOW!!! WHAT A B---!! You are already preparing for a divorce! Should be too! I would let you drive the car out of town, then come pick it up and leave your a$$ on the road!!!
F-That!!!!!
You continue to inspire me.
You should have had Phil buy you that black Z-28 that was behind the Caliber. That car would look great sitting on blocks in front of your house in a few years!
Wait - that's a hot car to you? Bwah ha ha ha haaaaaaaaaaa
This is great. I read 1 blog of yours today and was like "wtf?". Needless to say, I thought you might have some issues you needed to work on. Then I kept reading.. One post after another. They're great. You're great.
Thanks for sharing your warped and twisted mind.
Peace.
People sure get jealous when you get yourself a new car, don't they?
This was mean. People should not expect divorce.... well actually, in your case i will make an exception. (Leave her Phil) Well your lucky you got Phil. Its true what they say, "Every Dog has its day"
your such a gold digger !! and also very selfish...get over yourself already. its not like you are even halfway attractive
Jocelyn I really hope your reading these comments. i feel sorry for you, your kids and especially Phil
I feel sorry for your kids. Really.
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