Last night I visited Empire, a local bar that's popular with the young people. It's more crowded than usual because VCU is back in session. I only meant to have a couple drinks, but ended up finishing off their last bottle of Bushmill's, along with a couple glasses of hard cider. I headed for the restroom, but it was full, so I stepped outside to pop a squat.
That's when I noticed this good lookin' dude outside the Mediterranean restaurant across the street. He looked pretty young, but had this scary face tattoo, and the piercing eyes of a violent sociopath. After gawking at a group of young college girls he turned his glance towards me. I must admit that after a moment of curious eye contact I was totally hooked!
He followed me into the alley and watched me pee. Then we split the plastic flask of Bowman's vodka that I keep in my purse for emergencies. He broke out a pipe with some meth and we got really tore up. He confessed that he had just gotten out of prison, and only had that face tattoo to keep men from hitting on him in the showers. He dared me to kiss him. I did. Then I dared him to punch the next person who walked by.
From there we kept making dares, and it got really funny. He dared me to grab somebody's ass. I jumped out and grabbed the ass of some poor freshman. And I don't mean a harmless cheek squeeze. I'm talking about a deep grab, with the middle finger hooked towards the balls and everything! That poor boy squealed and ran off swearing like a sailor!
We spent the next hour like that, harassing kids and making bets. I got him to start asking people for change, and some of them actually gave him money! Even the people who turned him down were nice about it. But there was this one kid that said no kind of rudely, and we could tell he had money. We gave him a world of shit, and even followed him up into the student parking deck, yelling and threatening him.
It's funny now, because I never asked this strange man's name, but the added mystery started to make me wonder about the guy. He asked me for a ride, which was fine, but then kept implying that I should take him home with me. I had no intention of doing that, but I made him think that I would. I gave him a couple of pills that I told him were ecstasy, but actually they were these hardcore tranquilizers that I bought from some sketchy bitch at the Greyhound bus station.
So we're riding in the car, and suddenly he pulls out an envelope of money that the prison gave him when he was released. It contained a couple hundred dollars. He said I could have all of it if I slept with him. I smiled and winked. That's when he passed out, face first into the dashboard. I drove on to a quiet side road, emptied his pockets, undressed him, and rolled him into the ditch. This was not easy for me to do, because he was a heavy little fucker, and I could have used the sex.