I want to congratulate my niece Sarah for winning a spot in the Guinness Book of World Records! They even opened up a new category for "most herring expelled from a single human body"! Good going, Sarah! Your mama will never get that smell out of the drapes!
If anyone wants a souvenir of this historic event, come on down to the fruit stand outside my cousins' farmhouse on Rt. 5! The herrings have been smoked to perfection and are now available for purchase!